Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Helpful kitchen tips...

To determine whether an egg is fresh, immerse it in a pan of cool, salted water. If it sinks, it is fresh~if it rises to the surface, throw it away.

Keep the linings from cereal boxes~they make great substitutes for waxed paper!

To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes!

Use a meat baster to "squeeze" your pancake batter onto the hot griddle~ perfect shaped pancakes every time!

Use lifesavers candy to hold candles in place on your next birthday cake! Kids love 'em!

Poke an egg with a small sewing needle before hard-boiling, and the egg will peel with ease! And hold that needle in place with a magnet refrigerator clip!

Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips!

Zap garlic cloves in the microwave for 15 seconds and the skins slip right off!

To prevent egg shells from cracking, add a pinch of salt to the water before hard-boiling!

Use a pastry blender to cut ground beef into small pieces after browning!

Sweeten whipped cream with confectioners' sugar instead of granulated sugar~it will stay fluffy and hold it's shape better!

For easy "meatloaf mixing", combine the ingredients with a potato masher!

If you don't have enough batter to fill all cupcake tins, pour 1 tablespoon of water into the unfilled spots...this helps preserve the life of your pans!

To easily remove honey from a measuring spoon, first coat the spoon with nonstick cooking spray!

Run your hands under cold water before pressing Rice Krispies treats in the pan~the marshmallow won't stick to your fingers!

Mash and freeze ripe bananas, in one-cup portions, for use in later baking~no wasted bananas (or you can freeze them whole, peeled, in plastic baggies)

To quickly use that frozen juice concentrate, simply mash it with a potato masher~no need to wait for it to thaw!

To get the most juice out of fresh lemons, bring them to room temperature and roll them under your palm against the kitchen counter before squeezing!

Spray your tupperware with non-stick cooking spray before pouring in tomato-based sauces~no more stains!

Transfer your jelly to a small plastic squeeze bottle~no more messy, sticky jars or knives! This also works well for homemade salad dressing!

Save your store-bought-bread bags and ties~they make perfect storage bags for homemade bread!

When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead~no white mess on the outside of the cake!

Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator it will keep for weeks!

When making bread, substitute non-dairy creamer for the dry milk~it works just as well! Rinse cooked, ground meat with water when draining off the fat~this helps "wash away" even more fat!

Slicing meat when partially frozen makes it easier to get thin slices.

Instead of throwing away bread heels or leftover cornbread, use them to make bread crumbs. For use later, store them in the freezer.

Substitute half applesauce for the vegetable oil in your baking recipes~you'll greatly reduce the fat content! (Example: 1/2 cup vegetable oil = 1/4 cup applesauce + 1/4 cup oil)

To ripen avocados and bananas, enclose them in a brown paper bag with an apple for 2-3 days!

Brush beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful, glossy finish!

In recipes calling for margarine, substitute reduced-calorie margarine to help cut back on fat! (Same goes with sour cream, milk, cheese, cream cheese, and cream soups)

Place a slice of bread in hardened brown sugar to soften it back up!

When boiling corn on the cob, add a pinch of sugar to help bring out the corns natural sweetness!

Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.

If you have problem opening jars: Try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy!

Potatoes will take food stains off your fingers. Just slice and rub raw potato on the stains and rinse with water.

To take the tears out of chopping onions: Plug in a portable fan and turn it to high. It'll help blow away the fumes from your eyes - no more tears!

Don't panic if your soup's too salty: Add cut raw potatoes and throw them away once they are cooked and have absorbed the salt. Your soup's saved!

Instead of throwing away a sponge that has a stale odor, simply toss it in the dishwasher and wash it with the next load of dishes. It will come out clean and fresh smelling and will kill any bacteria in the sponge, so it's a good idea to toss your sponges into the dishwasher often.

Save celery leaves. Spread them out on paper towels or a paper plate and let them dry. Crumble them into soups, salads and stuffing's. They will add an extra zippy flavor for free.

Make giant ice cubes in muffin tins or plastic margarine bowls. These are perfect for using in picnic coolers or punch bowls. They look pretty and keep your drinks or food cold longer.

Don't throw those single serving gelatin plastic cups away, make your own single servings. Place the cups in a muffin holder, fill the cups and place in the refrigerator. It only takes a few minutes and no mess.

Fruit Freshener - Use 2 vitamin C tablets in a big bowl of water...let them dissolve and stir...dunk any veggie or fruit and it will stay fresh for a couple of weeks and vitamin C won't hurt you either! Try it out on a potato... dunk the potato and leave it out on the sink..it won't discolor... It's the short version of "fruit fresh ".

Cottage cheese will remain fresher longer if you store it upside down in the refrigerator. This slows the effects of oxidation.

To keep milk past it's expiration date add salt. A pinch of salt in a gallon will do it. The salt slows the rate of bacteria growth.

Brown sugar will not harden if stored in the freezer.

If you freeze wild rice it will last 3-4 months compared to a week in the refrigerator. A good trick when you go away on vacation is to place a baggie with a few ice cubes in the freezer. If a power failure occurs while you are gone and the food thaws and then refreezes you will know about it when you get home.

Ice cream container sealed in a plastic bag will stop ice crystals from forming when it is in the freezer.

Potato chip bag open again and they're all stale and yucky?? Pop them in the microwave for 30 to 60 seconds, let stand for two minutes and they'll be crispy again.

safe phone lovin'

Can we come in?

If Dunnski sees this...

I'll never get him back!

Snow baby!

Blast from the past...

This weekend, Dunnski's Dad and Stepmom came to town on their way to warmer climates for the remainder of winter. Sunday morning we treated them to brunch at Lynn's Paradise Cafe.

The decor is very unique and quirky, but Lynn's offers the tastiest "down home" cooking and genuine southern hospitality. Not to mention some of the 'best' of the ugliest lamp entries to the Kentucky State Fair, a competion that is held every year and draws a very big crowd.

As we were leaving, I ran into the ladies room and I was taken back 30 years to my bedroom as a child. A lamp that I had by my bed as a little girl, was in Lynn's bathroom. I had totally forgotten about this lamp...



Wow, the 70's were an awesome time to be a kid!

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Easy Oreo Truffles

Dunnski and I had a little party a couple of weeks ago and we made these little Oreo Balls....they were SO YUMMY. You have to try them...



What You Need!

1 pkg. (1 lb. 2 oz.) OREO Cookies, finely crushed, divided
1 pkg. (8 oz.) PHILADELPHIA Cream Cheese, softened
2 pkg. (8 squares each) BAKER'S Semi-Sweet Chocolate, melted


Make It!

MIX 3 cups of the cookie crumbs and the cream cheese until well blended. Shape into 42 (1-inch) balls.

DIP balls in melted chocolate; place on waxed paper-covered baking sheet. (Any leftover melted chocolate can be stored in tightly covered container at room temperature and saved for another use.) Sprinkle with remaining cookie crumbs.

REFRIGERATE 1 hour or until firm. Store any leftover truffles in tightly covered container in refrigerator.

Kraft Kitchens Tips

How to Easily Dip Truffles
To easily coat truffles with the melted chocolate, add truffles, in batches, to bowl of melted chocolate. Then use two forks to roll truffles in chocolate until evenly coated. Remove the truffles with forks and allow excess chocolate to drip back into bowl before placing truffles on prepared baking sheet.

Special Extra
Sprinkle truffles with colored sugar or sprinkles in addition to or in place of the cookie crumbs.



How to Soften Cream Cheese
Place completely unwrapped package of cream cheese in microwaveable bowl. Microwave on HIGH 10 sec. or just until softened. Add 15 sec. for each additional package of cream cheese.

Friday, January 23, 2009

I'm so embarrassed...

Some paparazzi stalker caught me picking me up diner the other night at Whole Foods and decided to post a picture on the internets.

Ha Ha...really funny. Just so you know, I dropped that ear of corn in the parking lot and nearly killed an elderly woman and her dog. I hope you can live with yourself now.

I only have one thing to say...

What in the hell is that monstrosity on her head???????????????

That is a bow big enough to put on a Lexus at Christmas time.

What was she thinkin'????

Hot Superhero Tamale of the Day!

Oriental Trading Company is the coolest catalog

EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I need to order two of these for overnight shipping...Dunnski will be sooooo surprised!!!


Thursday, January 22, 2009

Just give me the gas damn it!!!


I went to Kroger last night to fill up the tank and I have to say that I was more than slightly annoyed upon returning to the shelter of the warm car.

I began by, of course, finding my Kroger Plus Card and then stepping out in the frigid temps, this is where my story begins to get annoying. The gas pump starts asking me a random set of questions that made me very happy that I am on an antidepressant.

1. Would you like to pay inside or out?

2. Debit or Credit?

3. Are you a Kroger Plus Customer?

4. Please scan your Kroger Plus Card.

5. Would you like a receipt with your transaction?

6. Would you like a car wash today?

7. Please enter your PIN #.

8. Please select grade of gasoline.

9. Would you like fries with that?

10. Please leave a urine sample and remember to wipe from front to back.

Holy shit! I just want some gas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And did I mention it is 2 freakin' degrees outside???

I am NOT happy!

I searched Victoria's Secret UP and DOWN the other day for a cute bra in my, uhhhummm, fuller figure size, and I could not find anything other than something my Grandmother would wear.

So, I ask you......how does the hoochie below get a gorgeous VS bra to fit those mamba wamba's?????

And mine are real!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Life is so not fair.

The most disturbing thing you will see today...



What? Who? Why?

courtesy of

Woops I did it again...

I need to get better lighting in my closet. I grabbed a pair of pants this morning that I thought were black and gray. I matched it with a cute little satiny black and white short sleeve top with a black sash that tied in the back.

ADORABLE!

Until we got half way to work and I realized that my pants were actually navy and gray.

Dunnski, although did not seem to have the same degree of alarm to my realization as I did.

Men.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Obama's touching letter to his daughters...

If only all fathers knew that their little girls believed they hung the moon...doesn't matter how old we get.


Dear Malia and Sasha,


I know that you've both had a lot of fun these last two years on the campaign trail, going to picnics and parades and state fairs, eating all sorts of junk food your mother and I probably shouldn't have let you have. But I also know that it hasn't always been easy for you and Mom, and that as excited as you both are about that new puppy, it doesn't make up for all the time we've been apart. I know how much I've missed these past two years, and today I want to tell you a little more about why I decided to take our family on this journey.

When I was a young man, I thought life was all about me-about how I'd make my way in the world, become successful, and get the things I want. But then the two of you came into my world with all your curiosity and mischief and those smiles that never fail to fill my heart and light up my day. And suddenly, all my big plans for myself didn't seem so important anymore. I soon found that the greatest joy in my life was the joy I saw in yours. And I realized that my own life wouldn't count for much unless I was able to ensure that you had every opportunity for happiness and fulfillment in yours. In the end, girls, that's why I ran for President: because of what I want for you and for every child in this nation.

I want all our children to go to schools worthy of their potential-schools that challenge them, inspire them, and instill in them a sense of wonder about the world around them. I want them to have the chance to go to college-even if their parents aren't rich. And I want them to get good jobs: jobs that pay well and give them benefits like health care, jobs that let them spend time with their own kids and retire with dignity.

I want us to push the boundaries of discovery so that you'll live to see new technologies and inventions that improve our lives and make our planet cleaner and safer. And I want us to push our own human boundaries to reach beyond the divides of race and region, gender and religion that keep us from seeing the best in each other.

Sometimes we have to send our young men and women into war and other dangerous situations to protect our country-but when we do, I want to make sure that it is only for a very good reason, that we try our best to settle our differences with others peacefully, and that we do everything possible to keep our servicemen and women safe. And I want every child to understand that the blessings these brave Americans fight for are not free-that with the great privilege of being a citizen of this nation comes great responsibility.

That was the lesson your grandmother tried to teach me when I was your age, reading me the opening lines of the Declaration of Independence and telling me about the men and women who marched for equality because they believed those words put to paper two centuries ago should mean something.

She helped me understand that America is great not because it is perfect but because it can always be made better-and that the unfinished work of perfecting our union falls to each of us. It's a charge we pass on to our children, coming closer with each new generation to what we know America should be.

I hope both of you will take up that work, righting the wrongs that you see and working to give others the chances you've had. Not just because you have an obligation to give something back to this country that has given our family so much-although you do have that obligation. But because you have an obligation to yourself. Because it is only when you hitch your wagon to something larger than yourself that you will realize your true potential.

These are the things I want for you-to grow up in a world with no limits on your dreams and no achievements beyond your reach, and to grow into compassionate, committed women who will help build that world. And I want every child to have the same chances to learn and dream and grow and thrive that you girls have. That's why I've taken our family on this great adventure.

I am so proud of both of you. I love you more than you can ever know. And I am grateful every day for your patience, poise, grace, and humor as we prepare to start our new life together in the White House.

Love, Dad

The boy, hockey stick and dentist

It is good to know there is still kindness in this crazy world we live in.

Is it Friday yet???

Guess who?



Hint....I have quite a bit of faith that no one wants his sex this Christmas.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Oh, the good ole' days...



When 5-year-old May Pierstorff asked to visit her grandmother, her parents had no money to buy a rail ticket.

So they mailed her.

On Feb. 19, 1914, May's parents presented her at the post office in Grangeville, Idaho, and proposed mailing her parcel post to Lewiston, some 75 miles away. The postmaster found that the "package" was just under the 50-pound weight limit, so he winked at their plan, classed May as a baby chick, and attached 53 cents in stamps to her coat. May passed the entire trip in the train's mail compartment and was duly delivered to her grandparents in Lewiston by mail clerk Leonard Mochel.


Posted in Oddities by Greg Ross on December 31st, 2008

Who knew??


Reading THIS, you'll NEVER look at a banana in
the same way again!!

Bananas which contain three natural sugars (sucrose, fructose and glucose) and fiber give an instant, sustained, and substantial boost of energy.

Research has proven that just two bananas provide enough energy for a strenuous, 90-minute workout. No wonder the banana is the number one fruit with the world's leading athletes. But energy isn't the only way a banana can help us keep fit.It can also help overcome or prevent a substantial number of illnesses and conditions, making it a must to add to our daily diet.

Reducing Depression: According to a recent survey undertaken by MIND amongst people suffering from depression, many felt much better after eating a banana. This is because bananas contain tryptophan, a type of protein that the body converts into serotonin, known to make you relax, improve your mood and generally make you feel happier.

PMS: Forget the pills -- eat a banana. The vitamin B6 it contains regulates blood glucose levels, which can affect your mood.

Anemia: High in iron, bananas can stimulate the production of hemoglobin in the blood and so helps in cases of anemia.

Blood Pressure: This unique tropical fruit is extremely high in potassium yet low in salt, making it the perfect to beat blood pressure. So much so, the US Food and Drug Administration has just allowed the banana industry to make official claims for the fruit's ability to reduce the risk of blood pressure and stroke.

Brain Power: Two-hundred students at a Twickenham (Middlesex, UK) school were helped through their exams this year by eating bananas at breakfast, break, and lunch in a bid to boost their brain power. Research has shown that the potassium-packed fruit can assist learning by making pupils more alert.

Constipation: High in fiber, including bananas in the diet can help restore normal bowel action, helping to overcome the problem without resorting to laxatives.

Hangovers: One of the quickest ways of curing a hangover is to make a banana milkshake, sweetened with honey. The banana calms the stomach and, with the help of the honey, builds up depleted blood sugar levels, while the milk soothes and re-hydrates your system.

Heartburn: Bananas have a natural antacid effect in the body, so if you suffer from heartburn, try eating a banana for soothing relief.

Morning Sickness: Snacking on bananas between meals helps to keep blood-sugar levels up and avoid morning sickness.

Mosquito Bites: Before reaching for the insect bite cream, try rubbing the affected area with the inside of a banana skin. Many people find it amazingly successful at reducing swelling and irritation.

Nerves: Bananas are high in B vitamins that help calm the nervous system.

Overweight and at Work? Studies at the Institute of Psychology in Austria found pressure at work leads to gorging on comfort food like chocolate and crisps. Looking at 5,000 hospital patients, researchers found the most obese were more likely to be in high-pressure jobs. The report concluded that, to avoid panic-induced food cravings, we need to control our blood-sugar levels by snacking on high carbohydrate foods every 2 hours to keep levels steady.

Ulcers: The banana is used as the dietary food against intestinal disorders because of its soft texture and smoothness. It is the only raw fruit that can be eaten without distress in over-chronicler cases. It also neutralizes over-acidity and reduces irritation by coating the lining of the stomach.

Temperature Control: Many other cultures see bananas as a "cooling" fruit that can lower both the physical and emotional temperature of expectant mothers. In Thailand, for example, pregnant women eat bananas to ensure their baby is born with a cool temperature.

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD): Bananas can help SAD sufferers because they contain the natural mood enhancer, tryptophan.

Smoking Cessation: Bananas can also help people trying to give up smoking. The B6 and B12 they contain, as well as the potassium and magnesium found in them, help the body recover from the effects of nicotine withdrawal.

Stress Relief: Potassium is a vital mineral, which helps normalize the heartbeat, sends oxygen to the brain and regulates your body's water balance. When we are stressed, our metabolic rate rises, thereby reducing our potassium levels. They can be re-balanced with the help of a high-potassium banana snack.

Stroke Risk: According to research in The New England Journal of Medicine, eating bananas as part of a regular diet can cut the risk of death by strokes by as much as 40%!

Wart Removal: Those keen on natural alternatives swear that if you want to kill off a wart, take a piece of banana skin and place it on the wart, with the yellow side out. Carefully hold the skin in place with a plaster or surgical tape!

Splinter Removal: For those hard-to-remove wood splinters, rather than poking and prodding with tweezer and needle, take a small piece of banana skin, large enough to cover the splinter wholly, yellow side out, and carefully tape it over the splinter with a band-aid or tape. Overnight the banana and its enzymes will work the splinter out, dissolving it and sealing the wound. So in the morning, when you remove the band-aid, the pad will be yucky brown mush and no more splinter!

CONCLUSION: So, a banana really is a natural remedy for many ills. When you compare it to an apple, it has four times the protein, twice the carbohydrate, three times the phosphorus, five times the vitamin A and iron, and twice the other vitamins and minerals. It is also rich in potassium and is one of the best value foods around!

So maybe its time to change that well-known phrase so that we say: "A banana a day keeps the doctor away!"


Reprinted with permission from Seaside Scoop, August 17, 2004.

Like playing with paperdolls?

Click here.

I'm glad I don't live on one of these streets...







Tuesday, January 13, 2009

I could see this happening to me...

Click on the picture and take a look at her back end.

Oh. Mah. Gah.

After the prince died, Dopey was more than happy to take care of business, especially when Snow White agreed to become a blonde.

This is soooooo NSFW....

click here

Monday, January 12, 2009

oy vey...

This girl and our daughter should NOT become friends.

I think Cork's high score for a month is a little over 7k texts.

Where do they find the time?

Happy Birthday Elaine!

My Aunt loves Tom Selleck, (well, most women do...he is a hunk a hunk a man)...so in honor of her birthday..I give her this cake. Ummmm....Pay no attention that is says "Emma" on the cake, just imagine that it says "Elaine".

Have a great one!

Sunday, January 11, 2009

You and Me

DUI...Texas Style

Only a person in Texas could think of this.

From the county where drunk driving is considered a sport, comes this story.

Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a bar in
Austin, Texas after last call the officer noticed a man leaving the
bar so apparently intoxicated that he could barely walk.

The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the
officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity in which he
tried his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his
car and fall into it.

He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the
bar and drove off.

Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off–it was a
fine, dry summer night–, flicked the blinkers on and off a couple of
times, honked the horn and then switched on the lights.

He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then
remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other
patrons’ vehicles left.

At last, when his was the only car left in the parking lot, he pulled
out and drove slowly down the road.

The police officer, having waited patiently all this time, now started
up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man
over and administered a Breathalyzer test.

To his amazement, the Breathalyzer indicated no evidence that the man
had consumed any alcohol at all!

Dumbfounded, the officer said, I’ll have to ask you to accompany me to
the police station.

This Breathalyzer equipment must be broken.’

‘I doubt it,’ said the truly proud Redneck. ‘Tonight I’m the
designated decoy.’

I could watch this 1000 times...and it still makes me cry

**cough, cough**

Friday, January 09, 2009

Young love

Sweethearts aged six and seven elope for Africa


Two childhood sweethearts, aged six and seven, eloped from Hannover in northern Germany on New Year's Eve, determined to tie the knot under the African sun, police said on Monday.

The pair identified as Mika and Anna-Lena "are very much in love and decided to get married in Africa where it is warm, taking with them as a witness Anna-Lena's little sister, aged five," police spokesman Holger Jureczko told AFP.

The idea for the romantic trip began when Mika told the two girls about his recent holiday in Italy, while their families celebrated New Year's Eve together. "From this, the children began to make plans for the future," Jureczko said.

As the first dawn of 2009 broke, the trio started to put these plans into action, packing all the essentials for the journey, including "sunglasses, swimming trunks, a lilo, summer clothes and provisions."

While their parents slept, they left their house in the suburbs of Hannover, walked a kilometre (two-thirds of a mile) up the road to a tram stop from where they took a tram for the central station.

Waiting for a train to the airport, they aroused the attention of a guard who contacted police.

Two officers managed to convince the young lovers that they would struggle to get to Africa without money or a plane ticket. As a consolation, the children were given a special tour of the police headquarters at Hannover station where they were especially taken with the detention cells.

Their relieved parents picked them up from the station, the spokesman said, adding: "They can still put their plan into action at a later date."

I? am NOT a sucker!!

Labor pains and icing...

I think mom had a much easier labor with Jenny than she did with Vernon. She is making that very evident with this...

Thursday, January 08, 2009

What?

I am at a loss for words....so just read this.

I could have baked a thousand cakes and not put Ken on top of any of them.

Geeesshhhhh.

P.I.L.F.

People really are sick.

I heard about this story yesterday on NPR on the way to work. I had no intention of blogging about it, the poor man had been through far enough humiliation.

But then the more I thought about it, I just had to say one thing....

What is wrong with our society?? This poor guy is hanging upside down, bare nakey from a ski lift, and onlookers are taking pictures of his peen.

People really are sick.

I think I need to be admitted...

Wednesday, January 07, 2009

#37 of things that annoy me...

You know when your hands are really dry and you grab your favorite bottle of lotion and that hard clump that dried to the end of the nozzle comes out with your lotion?!?!?

I really hate that.

I am watching my wiet...

I'll just have a leg please...



cake courtesy of

Wordless Wednesday

Ladies...

Remember a couple of days ago when I posted an entry about Sporticus from LazyTown being an undercover hottie in costume?





Well, take a look at Robbie Rotten!




Oh, and this is the girl who wears the pink wig...


I am pretty sure they are the only humans on LazyTown. And to be honest, have you ever seen the show? If I were trapped in Willy Wonka's factory, and it was overrun by spiders, and I was tripping on acid, and I had sunstroke, I would never hallucinate anything this creepy scary! The show originated in Iceland, so I am assuming Icelandic kids like tumbling Frenchmen battling Jay Leno look-alikes.

By the way...I would like to thank Mandy for this post, she was my inspiration.