Wednesday, July 22, 2009

I Saw God 10 Years Ago Today

I have been thinking a lot today about how much my life has changed since my youngest was born 10 years ago today. I still cannot believe she is already 10 years old. I want so badly to keep her little in my mind for as long as I can, but, it seems the harder I try, the faster she grows up. I had a feeling after she was born, she might be my last baby (since my now ex had to be talked into kids, I felt pretty lucky to have two) so I tried to soak up every little sound, every smell...the sweet baby powder smell that babies always have. Before we moved into our new home, her old room always had the sweetest baby smell, even as she got bigger. I miss that in our new house, I have tried to recapture it, but I can't. I don't know what it was, and I can't explain it, but I loved it.


I had a c-section with both girls and I can honestly say when each of my daughters were first brought into my room after being in recovery, I saw God.


click to here George Strait: I Saw God Today

Just walked down the street to the coffee shop
Had to take a break
I'd been by her side for 18 hours straight
Saw a flower growin' in the middle of the sidewalk
Pushin' up through the concrete
Like it was planted right there for me to see
The flashin' lights
The honkin' horns
All seemed to fade away
In the shadow of that hospital at 5:08
I saw God today

I've been to church
I've read the book
I know he's here
But I don't look
Near as often as I should
Yeah, I know I should
His fingerprints are everywhere
I just slowed down to stop and stare
Opened my eyes and man I swear
I saw God today

Saw a couple walkin' by they were holdin' hands
Man she had that glow
Yeah I couldn't help but notice she was startin' to show it
Stood there for a minute takin' the sky
Lost in that sunset
Splash of amber melted in the shades of red

I've been to church
I've read the book
I know he's here
But I don't look
Near as often as I should
Yeah, I know I should
His fingerprints are everywhere
I just slowed down to stop and stare
Opened my eyes and man I swear
I saw God today

Got my face pressed up against the nursery glass
She's sleepin' like a rock
My name on her wrist
Wearin' tiny pink socks
She's got my nose, she's got her mama's eyes
My brand new baby girl
She's a miracle
I saw God today


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4 comments:

joe said...

A C-section??? Ouch!

greta130 said...

Happy birthing anniversary to you! :) They grow up WAY too fast. I'd birth me some more if the world weren't so screwed up and I weren't so damn old!!!!

bonsairick said...

Ahhhh, wait til they're adults - it's an INCREDIBLE experience to be able to relate to your kids as peers vs children! (They're always your babies - you'll find out what I mean.) As they got older, there was a point for me where instead of teaching them, I began learning from them. That was WAY COOL!

Congratulations to you and your daughter!

Charmed said...

joe: Yeah, c-sections are not very pleasant, but I guess they beat having your vajayjay stretched to New Jersey and back. I had a strange problem where I could only dilate to 2cm with each delivery. Not to mention, my first baby was trying to come out butt first, so that was not going to work. I tried a v-bac with my second, but never could get past the 2cm mark, and after 26 hours, I was REALLY tired and ready for her to get out of me!!

Greta: Thanks. I know, this is a screwed up world and I am older than you!!

Rick: Thanks and now you have given me something to look forward to. I have never thought about my kids as adults, and that I might be learning from them one day. Wow...and yes, they will always be my babies. :u)