Friday, June 19, 2009

I would like a little goat cheese with my whine....damn it!

I have been feeling a lot like the 'irritable vowels' lately.

My birth certificate says I am only 39 years old but my body tells me something very, very different. It has been screaming at me lately like a relentless toddler that cannot be bribed with the sweetest confection or expensive plaything.

It really is getting old.

When my week started off a little sluggish, I assumed it was because I was tired from a weekend trip to Cincinnati that Dunnski and I enjoyed. Or, it could have been that I was tired of thinking about how I pissed my sister-in-law off by drinking by a glass of wine at a family gathering. Wait, didn't I already mention that I was 39 years old? I think that is old enough to decide if I am mentally and physically capable of consuming, what I would guess to be, 4 ounces of wine and being able to safely transport myself and my children home. It always makes me laugh when people who live in glass houses throw the biggest stones. And, for those of you wondering if I am a fallen down drunk, the answer is...NO. Here is the deal....I happen to come from a large family of non-drinkers...well, that would be my parents that do not drink. Everyone else may enjoy an adult beverage in the privacy of their own home on occasion, but it would never cross into a social setting where one might be judged. I, on the other hand, the last time I checked, was an adult and I feel that I can drink a glass of wine or a beer in front of my parents and it is perfectly respectful. I would however, not get drunk of my ass in front of my parents, that would be very disrespectful, in my opinion. As a person of rational thinking, I also understand that anytime alcohol is consumed that it doesn't always have to lead to one becoming inebriated. Anywho, enough ranting, the story must go on.

So, Tuesday I start to get even more fatigued and my arms and legs are heavy and very sore. I'm thinking I just need to sleep. Well, I came home from work and slept from 6pm Tuesday night to noon on Wednesday. Hmmm...well, sleep was not the issue. I still feel like shit. And if things were not bad enough, at some point during the day, I leaned over to pick something off of the floor and I hear a crack and a pop in the middle of my lower back. NOT GOOD. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, 9 years ago, I injured my lower back and have since had lower back pain and pain in my left leg almost daily. So, I am now walking around like a 93 year old grandmother on her way to Bingo while my body aches and I am so sleepy I can't stay awake.

It is now Thursday and oh wait, it's just now starting to get interesting. I wake up and I am feeling pretty good so I think I can make it to work. I mean, I sit at a desk all day, how hard can that be right!? Well, I get not even halfway to work and I am covered in sweat, my legs are weak and my head is spinning. I had to turn around and go back home. Once home, I thought maybe a shower would make me feel better. I was wrong. After emerging from the most unpleasant shower of my life, I started to throw up. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME??????????? I called my doctor and she could see me at 2 that afternoon, so I passed out until my mother could come and get me and drive my sorry ass to the doctors office.

At the doctor, they run tests for strep throat, mono, 2 strains of flu and a pregnancy test. All of which are negative. At this point, I am again asking....WTF is wrong with me??????????? I am begging at this point for them to take my blood, take my saliva, take my ear wax, take my plasma.....I will give them any bodily fluid they want to find out what is making me feel so bad!! I was so weak, the lab came to me....instead of me going to the lab. Five vials of blood later and I still do not know anything. Results should be back in later Friday. The doctor concludes that I probably have one of the many strains of the flu that the office does not test for. Apparently, they only test for the most common types, GO FIGURE!

It is now Friday right before 5 and I have survived an entire day at work. I feel like I am going to pass out at the moment, but I made it through the work day. Yay me! And another good thing about being sick...I have joined WW and my weigh in was today. I had lost 3.6 lbs this week. Wow! Funny thing is, I would have gladly traded a weight gain for not being sick this week.

The only one happy I was sick this week was the dog. She was the recipient of all the hugs and kisses that would have been mine...because she is not contagious. Being sick sucks.


Midwest Mommy said...

Oh yuck! I hope you feel better soon.

btw- my family is the same way when it comes to drinking. It is a huge deal if the hubs and I have one drink, mind you we usually have it early and then don't leave for like 4-5 hours but it still doesn't matter.

bonsairick said...

Was wondering where you went (no blogs) - thought you guys might be on vacation. Sorry to hear I was wrong. Get better REAL soon.

Organic Meatbag said...

Wow...I wondered where you have been... sorry to hear about the illness...summertime flus are the worst!