Thursday, June 04, 2009

Bathroom Reading

I was reading an interesting blog post by The Perkster, there was some thought -provoking shenanigans going on in her workplace ladies room and it made me start thinking of bathroom stories. So, of course, I thought to myself, "I have to blog about this!" I mean, who wouldn't??

1. This question is for the ladies...Have you ever went into a stall after a sloppy squatter and the seat was left a little untidy? Ohhh...that is so the worst, especially when you really have to go! Did you ever learn to squat? My mother taught me to squat early in age. My dad played softball my entire childhood into my teen years, so we patronized some of the nastiness bathrooms you can think of. I should give a few softball parks props though, I have been in a few bars lately that have had nastier potties than some softball parks. Now, that is sayin' something. Back on topic, if you do tinkle on the seat, clean up after one wants to sit in your pee pee. Thank you and have a nice day.

2. I am not sure what is going on in our women's restroom on the third floor, but we have someone who does number 2 and leaves the evidence behind. I mean, A LOT of evidence! It is downright rank. How hard is it clean yourself and not leave any of it on the toilet seat, floor or stall? We are all grown women here, no toddlers, whose arms won't reach their little tooshies. There is no excuse for this kind of nastiness.

3. About 14 years ago at work, same workplace as mentioned above, we hired a temp who looked a little bit manly. Well, one day she went into the ladies room and some of the women, including me were also in there taking care of business. She went in the stall and stood with her feet toward the toilet, like a man does, and if you are wondering, I looked under the stall, that is how I can confirm the stance of her feet. When she was done, she grabbed the top of the door and opened it like a man would do. I mean, how many women actually grab the top of a door to open it? We later found out after she left that she/he was in the middle of a sex change operation. She had the top half of a female and still had the bottom half of a male. Hmmmmm.....delightful first date conversation, don't you think?


E said...

We are thinking she is a squatter. Which is fine, but flush the toilet paper after you clean up and please put the seat back down...the rest of us don't want to fall in!

I am pretty sure she doesn't actually have any man parts and she most likely never did, because I have heard her discussing in the breakroom how her and her husband are trying to get pregnant. But who knows.

Jerasphere said...

so glad you are bringing this up... I wish that the ladies of the 2nd floor of the same above mentioned work place, would stop coming down and using the 1st floor bathroom when they have to number 2. It would only make sense that they would go to the 2nd floor bathroom. You work on the 2nd floor. You have to pass your own to get to mine. It is a sign. You have to #2, you are on #2, go to #2. Besides, not sure what they are feeding them up there... but there is some serious stench and decaying going on, that is for sure!
Would much rather talk about this on your blog than mine.
And for the record, I am pretty sure that I can't reach the top of the doors, so... No, I don't pull or push from the top.

Organic Meatbag said...

C, maybe Dunnski has told you horror stories of the 3rd floor mens room? The one that we have to share with our little neighbors that rent part of the floor? Well, I've blogged about it in the past too... cretins, all of them...

kristi said...

Ewwwwwww. We have one supervisor who leaves "streaks" in our toilet. NASTY.