Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Martha FINALLY smiles...

It took a wiener this long to do that mustard or some kind of flavored lube?

I know we are doing something right...

Our oldest went to a friends house yesterday after school on the bus. About an hour after she arrived I received a frantic call from her and she was crying something 'had happened'. Now, as a mother, my stomach dropped and my heart began to race. My mind quickly went to the thoughts any mothers would of a 13yr old girl who looks like she is 18, and who has more curves than a country back road.

I asked, "WHAT HAPPENED?" She said she didn't want to tell me because I would freak out. I again, said loudly, "WHAT HAPPENED?!?" She said her and her friends walked to the woods and her friends asked her if she wanted to 'get high' with them. They were apparently going to sniff paint. Thank God, Cork has a sensible head and said "NO" and walked away. She called my Mom, who lives probably 2000 ft (if that) from this little hoodlums house, and my mother came and got her. Cork had already left the situation and walked up the street and was waiting for her ride.

WTF is wrong with kids these days? These girls are 13 years old and they are sniffing paint! Later, Cork told me that her other friend cuts herself and is very depressed, sometimes suicidal. This is heavy stuff, way too heavy for children to be carrying around. What is wrong? When I was in middle school it was a totally different world than today. Even the kids look different. I have pictures of me when I was 13 and I looked NOTHING like my daughter does now at 13. Is it in the water? Is global warming? I want answers damn it!!

Monday, September 22, 2008

If you are not watching this should be!

From AMC and the Emmy® Award-winning executive producer and writer of "The Sopranos" Matthew Weiner, comes Mad Men, a provocative new primetime drama about how to sell the truth. Set in 1960 New York, the daring new series is about the lives of the ruthlessly competitive men and women of Madison Avenue advertising, an ego-driven world where key players make an art of the sell while their private world gets sold.

Smoke, Drink, Man, Woman

Mad Men, the Golden Globe–winning AMC drama, begins its second season next month.

by Jonathan Kelly June 2008

Oh, the good old days, when men could knock back a few martinis at lunch and bed women as compulsively as they smoked Lucky Strikes, while no one furrowed a brow at the office.

This high-water mark of male chauvinism is the milieu of Mad Men, the Golden Globe–winning AMC drama, which, after picking up a legion of obsessed fans, begins its second season next month. Set in 1960, the show follows the advertising executives of the fictitious Madison Avenue firm of Sterling Cooper as they one-up each other with cynical jingles and dream about the Pan Am account, with its perks of flying first-class to London, with service by the stewardesses resuming at the Dorchester. Despite the fact that he was born on the eve of Woodstock, creator Matthew Weiner, 42, has recaptured the era with authenticity and without nostalgia. His secret? “Good fiction of the time—I’m talking about Salinger and Cheever—gives you a sense of place. That’s what I wanted this to feel like.” (The pilot, written eight years ago, was Weiner’s entrée to the writers’ room of The Sopranos.)

But it’s the characters who fascinate: Don Draper (Jon Hamm), dark, mysterious, breathtakingly handsome, yet emotionally castrated; Roger Sterling (John Slattery), a well-oiled dandy who laughs at his own jokes and sees arrogance as his greatest asset; and Sterling’s mistress, bosomy office manager Joan Holloway (Christina Hendricks). Perspicacious and flirty, she is the precursor of the flower generation, while Draper’s wife, Betty (January Jones), is the gorgeous orchid, frozen in Eisenhower-era black-and-white. The appeal of these characters transcends time. “Men were allowed to do different things back then,” says Weiner. “They feel exactly the same way now, but they just can’t act on it.”

Jonathan Kelly is an executive assistant to the editor of Vanity Fair.

My eyes hurt

I borrowed this picture from Descanter's family album. I can honestly say, it scares the hell out of me. I am going to have to sleep with the lights on for a few nights....sorry Dunnski.

I mean, is the blonde dude trying to slap the other dude and he is trying to stop him? Or is the blonde dude trying to slap himself silly for wearing that shade of lipstick? Or are they just thumb wrestling??? And for goodness sake, WHO picked the cloud background?? It totally clashes with their outfits. So many unanswered questions!!!!!!!!!!

Friday night shenanigans...

Dunnski and I met Mandy and Bill for dinner Friday night. The food and conversation was excellent. The service was not so excellent. I hate it when you go to a new trendy restaurant and they have hired a lot of pretty skinny people who look good when you walk through the door, but have no clue how to bar tend or wait on people properly. Oh well, the Godiva Chocolate Cheesecake almost made up for the terrible service.

Later at Bill and Mandy's, I learned that I really kick ass at this Wii game, even with holding a glass of wine in one hand and the Wii remote in the other hand.

And that I really suck ass at this game....must have been all the wine. in love

I went to Kohl's yesterday for a quick shopping trip while Dunnksi was working. And, am I glad I did! Look what I found...a pair of Vera Wang's on clearance for 20 bucks. They had been 70 dollars. Cha Ching! Not only were they a great deal, they are like butter on my feet. I am in love with these shoes. Usually I am wanting to take my heels off in the morning before I even get out the door. Not these babies, I don't even know they are on. So...what was the first thing I did when I got to work?

I found a black pair on eBay and bought them!!!!!!!!!!!!! I heart eBay!!!!

Friday, September 19, 2008

Ummm....where do I send my resume?

eBay OMG and WTF?

I heart eBay. Not only do I sell on eBay, I like to buy on eBay as well. Our youngest daughter has lost 12 lbs on her ADHD medicine in the last 3 months, so I have had to buy her some new clothes for Fall. I was looking at the lots of clothes in her size this week and look what I found....

mystery lot of limited too and other brands. sizes 12-14

Stop laughing. I swear this was the ONLY picture she posted. I am not sure if this item is going to sell.


Plastic surgery gone terribly, terribly wrong.

Her hair looks nice, though.

Harry Potter is all grown up!

And yes, I am old enough to be his mother. I am just making an observation.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Hot tamale of the day!

This is a terribly disturbing picture. Even more disturbing is how wonderful his hair looks. I wonder who his stylist is??

Avast, me hearties!

It's back! It’s that most auspicious of holidays, September 19th: International Talk Like a Pirate Day. All ye scurvy dogs, y’ed best be ex-agg-eratin’ yer ayes and arrs lest Davy Jones rise from the briny bottom and haul ye back to his locker.

It does not matter whether we be at work, swimming with sharks, or picking our kids up from daycare or smoking a turd to celebrate our wedding anniversary. What is important is that ye take on this hardy holiday with gusto and fervor and grab it by the barnacles and never let it go.

Shiver me timbers, mateys, Talk Like A Pirate Day is a phenomenon that whilst not go away. As pirate matey first class Dylan Thomas used to say, "Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light!"

Talk Like A Pirate Day is a chance to take ye spyglass and scrounge up a few doubloons and head to the local tavern for a schooner filled with ale. Partake of some noontime grub, whilst ye may. Polish yer hook and scratch yer arse if ye must, but get thee self out there and celebrate. Say "Ahoy ye varmints" to yer shipmates and speak with an accent. Be sure to tip the wench twenty pences for serving the ale. And, like any good pirate on this holiday, you're sure to be wearing yer best arrrrrggggyle socks.

I have to say...

I was a little disappointed with my lunch.

I went to Mazzoni's today. I was in the mood for a little spaghetti. First off, they got my order wrong. I ordered spaghetti and meatballs. What I received was baked spaghetti and meatballs. Now, don't get me wrong, I am not complaining about the abundance of cheese that was atop my noodles. What I did not care for was the lack of tomato sauce. I DO NOT like dry spaghetti noodles. There was a half inch thick layer of cheese on my noodles and no sauce. Where is the sauce? Did the cheese eat the sauce? As I was digging around I found two meatballs that resembled large dried elephant turds. Yummy. The garlic bread was good, and I am saving my salad for a late afternoon snack. Good times.


Eva Mendes has accomplished a lot in life. I'm not talking about all the movies she's starred in or all the "most sexiest" lists she's been on, I'm talking about the fact that she's had sexy times in all 50 states. Yes...that is what I said.

Eva said: "I’ve had sex in all 50 states. A lot of it was on a road trip I took when I was younger." She said she had the best sex in Arizona and Colorado. "Maybe it was the clear air, or the quiet, or the endless sky... whatever it was, it was really, really good.” And what about the worst? She said Alaska. “I’d really like a do-over on that state."

Why would anyone tell that? Is she looking for an award? I was going to Google an award to post for Eva..but I am at work, and I would like to keep my job. So, I will wait until I get home and find just the right award for her. Stay tuned.


Check out the world's smallest man and the woman with the world's longest legs. Again, I say...Wow!

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Trick or Treat!!

She is the pink Backyardigan...only much cuter, of course!!

And she would be MY baby, only my selfish brother won't let me keep her!!

Which flower are you?

You Are a Carnation

You are down to earth and grounded.

You tend to be more traditional than trendy.

Your confidence gets you through anything.

People trust you and are very loyal to you.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

What she meant to say...

My little one always keeps me on my toes. I took her to work with me the other day to take her to a doctors appointment and she asked me if we could get some chips out of the 'bendy machine'. It was all I could do not to laugh on our way to the vending machines downstairs in the kitchen.

So, the other night the girls wanted to order pizza and the youngest asks is we can order it from 'Little Seizures', instead of Little Caesars. I had to lay myself across the island in the kitchen I was laughing so hard.
I love this site on Blogger. It posts pictures of cakes gone wrong.

I am still shaking my head at this one. As the mother of a 13 year old girl, I would NEVER had approved of this cake. I am not sure what mother would have...

And this cake was for a baby shower...I mean, it is cute and all, but...

I'm not really sure I want to take knife to something that looks so much like a real baby.

And I am not really sure what to say about this poor fellow...other than he really lost his head...

I'm sorry, but that is just damn creepy!

Coming soon to a Kroger near you!


**Update** It is 2 in the afternoon and I still have these effin' hiccups!!!! I updated my original post at 8:45 this morning. GGGRRRRRRR!!!!
I have had the hiccups for the last 20 minutes. I can't stop. I am not so sure what is so wonderful about hiccups. I guess if I was riding on a hippo that had the hiccups that would be pretty cool. But, I am not. I am at work. And I am disturbing my co-workers. If you have any ideas please let me know...I MUST STOP.

Monday, September 15, 2008


It is only Monday and I am afraid that I might be having an aneurysm. Or, the top of my head is going to blow off. Either one is not going to be good.

The morning started off with no gas in the car and after visiting 3 gas stations we finally found one that actually had gas.

And what was up with the weather yesterday? Was Mother Nature having some major PMS or what? Hope everyone survived the weather OK and has electricity. If not, I hope it comes back on soon.

My Pet Peeves

1. When my pens are put in my pen cup on my desk with the tops off pen side down. All the ink gathers at the bottom. I hate that.

2. When my kids yell "MOM" from another room. And when I get to where they are, they tell me that their clothes are itching them. Or something just as silly.

3. When you make tentative plans with someone, then they cancel when someone better comes along. Then tell you how miserable you would be you won't feel bad. Rude.

4. When my oldest daughter calls me at work to tell me my youngest daughter is annoying her. WTF am I supposed to do about it, I am 37 miles away!

5. When the home phone rings, then your cell rings, then the home phone rings again. And it was the same person who called all three times but they did not leave a message any of the three times the called. GGGGRRRRR

6. To be continued...I will think of more....Trust me.....

Wednesday, September 10, 2008


No shit Sherlock

This article is making my ass hurt. Do you ever get the feeling some studies are conducted just to waste time? What is the purpose of studies like this?

Here is quote from the article, "But the researchers stress that because the study is so small, and the differences not "whopping", women contemplating C-sections shouldn't panic."

I guess this ruffles my feathers so because I had two C-sections. The first was not my choice, it was my daughters. She was trying to come out of me butt first with her feet up next to her head. This would not have had a happy ending if not for the emergency C-section. With my 2nd daughter, I tried to have a VBAC, but after 26 hours in labor and only 2cm dilation, there was no baby coming that way. Not to mention that I was induced a week early because after a C-section the uterus can weaken and tear if it stretched to much. Thus, I had my 2nd C-section.

C-sections are not fun. They are major surgery that you have to recover from once home as well as take care of your newborn. With a C-section, once your baby is born, you are given a very quick glimpse of the baby and then they are whisked away, while you are sutured and taken to recovery to lay alone until a nurse comes to check you for hemorrhoids. Good times.

Mothers do not need to be made to feel guilty about the way their children are brought into this world. The goal of childbirth is a healthy mom and baby, no matter how he/she comes into the world.

I'm done. I feel better now. Thanks for listening...or reading.

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

**heavy breathing** Ore-Ida! **heavy breathing**

It's all in the name...

Here are a few very bad, but funny stories of some unfortunate names.

1. My former roommate had a girlfriend named Luv Seamon. Actually her full name was Luv Joy Seamon.

I heard the daughter of the man behind Lear aviation was named Shanda Lear.

I'd like to point out that parents can be atrocious with normal names, too. I knew an accountant in Chicago a few years back named Mary Chris Smith.

When I was working in the Career Services of my undergraduate University, we of course had files on everyone who had come in looking for work (which was just about everyone at some point). We were privy to a lot of really odd names. Anyway, when I was working through a day of 'pre interviews' ... I suddenly realized I was faced with a bad bad name to try to call out in a crowded room: Kynda Boring. Giving her the benefit of a doubt, I called out with the pronunciation "Kin-da" and left the last name off. She corrected me as she came into the interview room, "No, it's pronounced 'Kind-a'." Ooooook, I just left it at that and suppressed my internal laughter and did the interview. I was filing paperwork later in the day and came across her name in the files and lo and behold, there's a twin sister there. Her name was ..... Michelle.

What is love?

Defined through the lens of Elliot Ewritt...

Friday, September 05, 2008

This is the most ANNOYING song ever!!!

I swear the first time I heard it, I thought something was wrong with my radio.

How to: Homemade Playdough

This is a great way to keep the kids from getting bored on a rainy Saturday or cold afternoon. I have made this a couple of times and it is a lot of fun. And, homemade playdough is cheap, non-toxic and lasts a long time.


3 cups flour, sifted
1 1/2 cup salt
6 teaspoons cream of tartar
3 1/4 cup water
3 tablespoons oil
food coloring (she uses the gel)

Whisk all the dry ingredients together in a large pot until no lumps remain. Whisk in the wet ingredients (except for the food coloring) and stir until no lumps remain. Cook on high for 3-4 minutes until a dough forms. Separate into several portions and add food coloring, kneading until uniform in color. Store in airtight containers.

Thursday, September 04, 2008


This is really here to see what I mean.

Who needs Fantasy Football!?

Word of the day...


Can you please speak English...

1. The bandage was wound around the wound.

2. The farm was used to produce produce.

3. The dump was so full it had to refuse more refuse.

4. We must polish the Polish furniture.

5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

7. Since there was no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.

8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10. I did not object to the object.

11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12. There was a row among the oarsmen on how to row.

13. They were too close to the door to close it.

14. The buck does funny things when does are present.

15. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

16. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

17. The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

18. After a number of injections my jaw got number.

19. Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

20. I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

21. How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

Still looking for the right meds...

My youngest has now been on her ADHD medication for nearly two months. We are already on our 3rd "new" medication. She has had really bad stomach pains with each one, which is one of the side effects of the medication. Her stomach was cramping so bad yesterday, she was crying and begging me to take her the doctor. I made an appointment this morning and she spent the day at work with Dunnski and I. Because of the stomach pain, she has not been eating like normal. At her visit today, her weight had dropped by 12lbs since the middle of June. She is only 9, she does not have any extra reserves to lose. We are to try to get her to eat right before bed, a 4th meal, the doc called it. The medication should be out of her system by then and she should have an appetite. I hope it works.

I am happy to say that she is improving in her concentration and focus. She brought home a test last week and she had scored a 95%. That is really great for the first two weeks of school. Last week, I was able to complete the process of getting her an IEP (Individual Education Plan) with her school. She will get individualized attention and the extra help she needs to exceed. I am so happy that this process is over, the testing and the fighting the system, when all you want is to make the learning process easier for your child. It would be so simple if all children were the same and learned the exact same way, but unfortunately that is not the case.

Monday, September 01, 2008

Tomato Pie

I made a couple of tomato pies today. They were so easy to make and with all of the tomatoes we have now from the garden, I may need to find some other tomato recipes.

2 - 9 inch pie crusts (deep dish if you like lots of tomatoes)
3 to 4 tomatoes
1/4 c. green onion
1/2 c. sour cream*
1 c. cheddar cheese, shredded
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp pepper
3 tsp. dried basil (I used fresh basil)

Bake one pie crust at 425 degrees for 5 minutes. Reduce heat to 400 degrees. Line pie crust with tomatoes that are thickly sliced. Sprinkle with salt, pepper, basil and green onions.

Mix sour cream with cheddar cheese. Spread over tomato slices being sure to spread evenly and then top pie with other unbaked crust sealing edges. Bake 35 minutes. Serve hot and bubbly.

*Recipe called for mayonnaise but I used sour cream instead, I am not a big mayo fan.

It's London...

Kissing a squirrel

Kissing a dog



The sweetest face in the world...